Opening Statement: Thank you all for being here today. I apologize for my limited availability during weeks 1 and 2; however, magazine drive fundraisers to generate revenue for the league prevented me from allocating much of my time to media relations. With that out of the way along with an early-season controversy finally being settled, I should be able to make myself available to the media on a more regular basis.
Now, on to the reason that you are here: We have a huge game this week, there is no secret behind that. On paper, we have a great football team, to the point that we potentially have the greatest team that Safety Blitz has put on the field in the history of our franchise. But just like I told my guys, potential doesn't mean anything unless you prove it on the field. Case in point: Josh Hughes had the potential to be a college athlete, but instead he is smoking blunts and driving a forklift every day.
We were able to break the ice and get a victory over YGF last year in Week 17, but let's not kid ourselves here: Coach Young's squad wasn't at 100% and they were getting rest for their playoff run. It's just like a few years ago when the Colts were undefeated in the regular season going into the final weeks and they decided to sit Manning-yeah, they got beat, but who wants to hang their hat on that? We are gonna get YGF at full strength this week so we will have a better idea of how we match up late Monday night.
Curtis Marlin, Portland Leader: Coach Campbell, in his press conference earlier this week, Coach Young stated that he and Run DMC were the premier programs in the BHFFC. How do you and the other league coaches feel about this statement?
Coach Campbell: Well Curtis, opinions are like assholes; everybody has one. At the end of the day the bottom line is who has their name on the Confederation Cup, and the last time I checked I don't believe that either of those two coaches have their name on the Cup at this point in time.
Monte Hale, DNJ: Coach Campbell, you and Coach Young share a long, storied history dating back as far as Nicks Hall in the late 90's. Have the competitions between you two always been so one-sided in his favor?
Coach Campbell: Monte, you're trying to create a controversy and I'm not biting. Listen, Coach Young has a plethora of fantasy football experience, so I know that every time we square off it's an opportunity for me to learn something. But if you think for one second he dominates every encounter we have had, you need to ask him about the nascar and hockey video games we used to play!
Goose Lindsay, Roane County News: Coach, there are rumors that you have a special surprise guest that will serve as honory captain for Safety Blitz this weekend. Can you shed any light on that situation?
Coach Campbell: Goose! It's great to see you son. How long did it take you to travel here from Oakdale in your horse and buggy? Anyway, yes we have a surprise guest this weekend: Big Rose will be serving as honorary captain for us on Sunday. Big Rose recently tweeted about beating Young's ass at The Pond at Kingwood, so we figured we would invite him out this weekend to add a psychological advantage for our club. On top of that, the city of Portland will be ecstatic to have a native Pulaskian and dairy farmer in the stadium with us this weekend.
If there are no other questions, I would like to thank everyone for attending today and wish everyone in the league good luck this weekend. I look forward to seeing you again next week after a big Safety Blitz victory this weekend!
No comments:
Post a Comment