Game of the Week: Toejam Football (+33) @ Play Action Pass
Toejam Football makes the long trek east on I-40 to Monterey to battle Play Action Pass in a huge matchup for both teams. Toejam Football enters the contest in 1st Place overall and a win this weekend could go a long way in securing the #1 seed overall for the playoffs. Coach Zach Maddux is sticking to the "one game at a time" approach, however, insisting that his team is focused strictly on this weekend's contest. PAP is looking for their high octane offense to carry the load and possibly earn a share of the Lightning Division lead after this weekend's competition. Coach David Looper is offering free jugs of moonshine to the first 40,000 fans that enter the gates, which is sure to create a hostile environment. Look for this game to be determined by Jared Cook's ability to put up numbers against a weak Colts' defense.
Young Gun Football (-41) @ We Got Big TDs
Young Gun Football journeys north to Portland this weekend to battle We Got Big TDs. YGF is looking to stay on pace in the Lightning Division and could depart Portland with the #1 seed overall after all the dust settles. Coach Jason Young is hoping that rookie RB CJ Spiller will crank it up this weekend, as the newcomer has now had ample time to acclimate himself with the 1st team offense. We Got Big TDs is playing for pride from this point forward, as they have been eliminated from playoff contention. Coach Tara Campbell has benched starting TE Jason Witten this week, as Witten reportedly missed curfew and then muttered something about small breasts under his breath. With a battered and brusided Big TDs squad, anything less than a YGF victory in this contest would be a miracle.
The Pessimists (-21) @ Campbell's Cougars
The Pessimists travel to Columbia this weekend to take on the bulging Campbell's Cougars. The Pessimists are looking to stay in the playoff picture and find themselves one game out of 1st Place in the Thunder Division. Coach BJ Hudson has been unusually pessimistic regarding his teams play of late, stating that "my team is in a downward spiral." Campbell's Cougars have been in the news this week, albeit not for football purposes. PETA filed charges against Coach Matthew Campbell, as a picture has recently surfaced of Campbell mounting a dog while wearing a Santa costume. Look for this game to be determined by the RB2 and FLEX positions.
Tebow's Youth Group (+11) @ Illegal Alien Babies
Tebow's Youth Group travels across the border to battle the Illegal Alien Babies in a huge Thunder Division matchup. TYG finds themselves in 1st Place in the Thunder Division with the reality of the #1 seed overall well within their reach. Coach Daniel Campbell, who has pieced together his rushing attack all season, is looking to newly acquired RB Chris Ivory to carry the load this weekend from his FLEX position. The Illegal Alien Babies face a must-win situation this weekend if they wish to contend for the Thunder Division crown. Coach Darrell Campbell is calling on QB Tom Brady to lead his team to the promised land. The key matchup in this contest will be Chris Ivory vs. Brandon Lloyd.
Maddawg's Tight End (+34) @ Carmichael's Crusaders
Maddawg's Tight End journeys to Murfreesboro this weekend to battle Carmichael's Crusaders. MTE needs to win out and receive some help in order to keep their playoff chances alive. Coach Miranda Maddux will again be without the services of WR Andre Johnson, a theme that has become redundant during the course of this season. Carmichael's Crusaders enters the weekend one game off the pace for the Lightning Divison lead. Coach Ethan Hudson believes that the return of RB Adrian Peterson is just the spark that his team needs entering the home stretch. With both teams' defenses facing each other, that position could easily be the deciding factor in the contest.
Safety Blitz (-14) @ Riley's Vikings
Safety Blitz travels to Nashville and the campus of TSU to battle Riley's Vikings in a game being dubbed as "Two Teams That Suck." Safety Blitz is projected to score 121 points, but we all know that will never happen and they will be lucky to score half of that total. Coach Phillip Campbell is hopeful that Michael Vick can carry his team down the homestretch of the season and give his team a chance to win. Riley's Vikings will look to give their fans more bang for their buck than just the TSU band's halftime performance. Coach Adam Warren has joined Coach Matthew Campbell in the lawsuit from PETA, as he reportedly posted a video of an iguana performing unsightly behaviors. Look for this game to be determined by Tim Tebow's ability to praise God between each play today.
League Notes
YGF is projected to lead the league with 131 points...Campbell's Cougars and Carmichael's Crusaders share the league's longest current winning streak at two games...We Got Big TDs and Safety Blitz share the league's longest current losing streak at four games...TYG has the league's best home record at 6-2...Toejam Football has the league's best road record at 4-2...Drew Brees is projected to lead all players with 31 points...Arian Foster is projected to lead all running backs with 22 points...Wes Welker is projected to lead all wide receivers with 16 points...Rob Gronkowski is projected to lead all tight ends with 15 points...John Kasay and Neil Rackers are projected to lead the kickers with 12 points each...The Falcons and the Bengals are projected to lead all defenses with 11 points each...Playoff projections will be featured during next week's recap.
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